Surrendering, by definition, means giving up your attachment to predefined results, holding back on resisting, and simply being with what is in front of you, even if just for a moment.
It certainly does not mean giving up.
It means noticing, as if for the first time, the physical sensations in your body, feeling that energy of uncertainty linked to the times we are all facing and meeting, in the moment, that insecurity which leaves you desperately grasping for the illusion of control. It asks that you allow yourself to stop running, that you slow down and simply notice once again, taking a brand new look at all there is to appreciate in the moment of now.
The “how” of surrendering
One cannot both surrender and attempt to control the outcome. Yes, I know you certainly make a valiant effort to do just this and you might even get by doing this most of the time.
Truly surrendering, however, means letting go of ego’s desire to control and trusting in an outcome you have not yet thought of, knowing that a power far greater than yours will provide the solution that is best for you.
It is choosing to give up figuring out the when, where and with whom, leaving these details to that greater mind and fully believing that your creation will come in a way that you least expect. It is living with the absolute trust that events in your life will be tailored to your conscious intention.
A frightening thought at first, however, as you practice the art of surrendering you will increasingly find it extremely liberating.
Dr David Hawkins states that the impossible becomes possible as soon as we have completely surrendered since we often get what we want when we stop insisting on it.
The challenge with us humans is that when we start getting all hung up on the how – totally obsessed with making things happen exactly as we expect they should – we limit all the other possible “hows” available in a universe filled with limitless possibilities.
Imagine you came face to face with an incredible wizard who had the power to make all your dreams come true in a flash. Would you genuinely be spending your time telling the magician how to turn your dreams into reality, or would you rather use your time describing your dreams in the most insane detail, ensuring that the wizard was crystal clear on the “what”?
What should you do?
You should be exceptionally clear on the “what”.
You should certainly not be “giving up”. Your work is to ensure clarity in terms of what you want since this is far too often where the real problem lies. Once you have crafted this picture in exquisite detail, ensure that you align your intentions with this purpose, this desired future, and then, always, without exception, use your word with integrity.
What does this mean?
You need to be that person, the one that you, and others, can count on to do what you say you are going to do, by when you said you are going to do it.
You cannot continuously be saying things that are in direct contradiction to your purpose, your dream.
This aspect of “word integrity” reminds me of one of Don Miguel Ruiz’s four agreements, “always be impeccable with your word”. In fact, Don Miguel goes on to say that impeccability of ones words can lead to personal freedom, huge success and abundance.
What have I found?
I have found that being my word requires trust and surrender since I have to be prepared to give up any resistance I may have to my commitments.
You know, that commitment you make to exercise 4 times a week, and slowly after a few weeks, sometimes after only 2, you start resisting your commitments, finding valid reasons in abundance as to why you simply cannot meet these commitments.
This is where that slippery slope starts and before you know it months have passed and your doctor is staring at you with that stern look that makes all excuses fade into insignificance.
Personally, when I ensure that alignment between my words, my intentions, my actions and my dreams becomes a way of life, surrender is always the only thing that stands between me and the fulfilment of my dreams.
My life as Exhibit A
My future is continuously unfolding in a manner which allows me to play a role in crafting a space where humans can become the greatest versions of themselves, while I have the freedom and abundance to travel, write, learn and love; experiencing all the sights, adventures and gifts this world has to offer and becoming the greatest possible version of myself.
The “what” is clear. I have no idea how this will transpire and I have not limited it by defining a company, a country or a role. I am, however, constantly taking steps towards this future by ensuring that my words, my intentions and my actions are aligned, always doing all I can with what I have from where I am.
Now all that is left is that I surrender while trusting 100% that events will transpire in my favour even when on the face of it I am seldom able to figure out how.
What I do know is that I should not be messing with the “how” by constantly saying things such as, “I am too old for a change in career”, or “how will I ever travel now given COVID-19 and the impact it has had on my life?”, or “I may as well give up since there are so many people more qualified than me”.
I am certain that you can see how these would not be examples of using my word with integrity and aligning to my desired future.
To date, focusing on the “what” and leaving the “how” up to a far greater consciousness has allowed my life to live up to every single one of my intentions for my future – no exceptions.
Remember that the “what” is up to you, The “how” is up to God. So commit to your purpose while surrendering to your future.